Bladder Blues

I have been to the bathroom five times with this feeling I need to pee. Each time I sit there and…nothing. It’s not a matter of kidney failure, it’s bladder failure, or maybe retention is a better word.

I feel the need to go again, and know if I ignore the feeling, this will be the time it will happen and I’ll end up peeing my pants. So back to the bathroom I go. At least the back pain I woke up with has eased, and getting to the bathroom is not so much of a struggle.

This time I’m finally successful, something is better than nothing. But I’m uncomfortable and go to bed, try to read and end up having a nap.

I think I’m in ‘retention’, which is different than ‘urgency’ in the MS Bladder dictionary. Retention is being unable to go, not any, not at all, and urgency is a need-to-go-real-bad-right-now kind of rushed thing.

I’ve been in retention before, and the reason I feel that I’m in the grips of it again is that I have chills, ever since I peed about 2 hours ago. I cannot get warm, in spite of my fleece jacket and the fuzzy throw; I’m still cold, and shaking. I refuse to turn the furnace up, but if it doesn’t settle soon may take a warm bath to try and stop it. Yeah I know, warm bath, MS, not a good combination. That’s why I’ll put it off, try a warm cup of tea first, and have the bath later, when I can go to bed, and hopefully sleep.